Brooks is part of our sales team, having joined Emma from the laboratories of Vanderbilt University, where his work as a biophysics research assistant had him planning and performing fluorescence imaging experiments with a confocal microscope. If there’s one thing we’ve found, it’s that most of your talented sales folks are somewhere out there performing fluorescence imaging experiments with confocal microscopes. Seriously, go get them. Brooks has a working knowledge of written and spoken German, and we’re not sure if that’s somehow related or not, but rumor (or perhaps rumour) has it that Brooks will occasionally take on the accent of the person with whom he’s speaking on the phone. If, by luck, you sound exactly like Murray from Flight of the Conchords, please call now.
Jamie is a member of Emma's sales team and wears gigantic sunglasses. Not all the time, mind you, just when it's particularly sunny or time to show someone with regular-size sunglasses how it's really done. A native of Texas and attendee of both St. Edward's University and Belmont University, Jamie managed a shoe store (Bandolino) and worked as an account executive at an artist merchandise company (Stuph Clothing) before joining Emma. She lists Raising Arizona as her favorite movie of all time (well done) and lists Combos as her favorite snack (editor's endorsement withheld). And when she's not using her voice to dazzle Emma customers on the phone, Jamie can often be found doing vocal impressions of other people, all of whom invariably end up sounding like a 70-year-old woman from Mississippi. When it comes to vocal impressions, the conventional wisdom goes, do one elderly voice from the Deep South, and do it well.
Lisa heads up our business development efforts in the Portland area. She is also a soccer mom, but not in the stereotypical "soccer mom" way you're thinking, unless you're thinking of a mom whose kids are old enough to play soccer but not old enough to drive themselves there. Before joining Emma, Lisa developed business for a series of pharmaceutical companies and also lived for six years in Brazil, where she learned Portuguese. Among the boards she participates on is the American Society in São Paulo, where speaking Portuguese comes in much handier than it does on, say, a weekly Emma sales call. Not that a weekly sales call can't be spiced up by the occasional infusion of Portuguese — or Caipirinhas, if the sales meeting is happening after 11. Fine, 10. Lisa pours an excellent Caipirinha, incidentally, and may be the only graduate of the University of Tennessee who can make that claim. Just a guess.
Mary is part of our customer support team. She is known to eat a huge bowlful of Goldfish every day, which, let's be clear, is not a customer support team requirement. It's simply strongly encouraged, if you catch our drift. She's also into colorful drinks — blue, orange, red, green — you get the idea of drinks and how they can come in different colors — well, Mary's into them. She honed her customer service chops at Genesco (the company behind Journeys shoe stores and other shoe-related businesses), and she honed her interest in music being the daughter of a guitarist who was in Lynyrd Skynyrd. Cool, though still confounding how they slipped so many Ys into the name. When Mary isn't taking great care of Emma customers, she's likely to be designing clothes under her label, Skinny Riot!, watching her adorable son play soccer, or trying to keep up with her giant Great Dane named London. We probably didn't need to say "giant" in front of Great Dane, did we. Fair enough.
Jeffrey is our account development manager, helping us spread the word about Emma's reseller account for universities and creative firms. He joined us from Smoothie King, where he managed three stores, dozens of employees and countless citrus fruits. (Oranges are incorrigible.) An avid motorcyclist, Jeffrey has two regional Enduro titles to his name. Other titles Jeffrey holds: Die-Hard Preds Fan (a ref yelled at him once, so it's been verified), Maker of Best Jello Shots in the World (we won't ask) and Cap'n Monkeypants (okay, we're making them up now). One final note: Jeffrey has met N*SYNC, back when that was a thing, and the editor realizes that the proper spelling of N*SYNC involves both an asterisk and deep, deep shame.
Casey is a member of Emma’s sales team. A graduate of Beloit (pronounced “bell-wahh”) College in Wisconsin, Casey studied environmental geology as a result, we’re told, of having gone through the course book and circled everything she didn’t think she could teach herself. Oddly enough, she hates rocks. But she loves camping and drinking beer outside, so it worked out just fine in the end. In addition to her outdoor pursuits, Casey loves travel and food, particularly in combination. Her favorite treat from the road? Trout from Lake Titicaca. Her least favorite? Inca Cola, which looks like Mountain Dew but tastes like bubble gum. Casey also enjoys being part of a wine club and a book club, though she admits the two sometimes get mixed up, and before you know it everyone’s halfway through chapter nine of a Chalone 2003 Pinot Noir. It’s a wonderful read. Before joining Emma, Casey was with Aspect Software as a customer support consultant and a technical support manager. She was named an Aspect Top Performer of 2006, which she no doubt celebrated over a bottle of The Heart is a Lonely Hunter.
Theresa is part of our sales squad, having joined Emma from Mohawk, where she was part of a slightly more carpet-oriented sales squad. Hence her extensive knowledge of plush, shag, sisal, saxony, berber, and shard. Incidentally, and the Mohawk scientists will tell you this, you shouldn’t try making carpet out of shards of things. A devout Buckeyes fan, Theresa has two cats named Allie and Foxy and 57 cousins named, well, um, how about we just tell you about cousin Tata Young, a singer billed as Thailand’s very own pop sensation, and whose song “Temperature Rising” claims: “You’ve got my temperature rising like El Niño.” Sorry, other Theresa cousins — you’ve just been out-cousined. Theresa holds a Bachelor of Science in Communications from Ohio University in Athens. Not *that* Athens.
Cynthia leads our partner development efforts, working to bring lots of fabulous new partners into the Emma community. A Nashville native and graduate of Harpeth Hall School (and, later, Miami University in Ohio), Cynthia has, in the words of a colleague, a great Southern accent, a contagious laugh and an awesome willingness to jump in and help at any time. Also, if you feel like you may have caught Cynthia's laugh but it's resulting in a rash that started at the elbow and is spreading rapidly in all directions, that's not from Cynthia's laugh and you should really get that checked out, friend. Other habits of Cynthia's that may be contagious: drinking lots of black coffee and the frequent singing that emanates from her general desk area throughout the day. If you think taking away her coffee might lead to less frequent singing, though, you would be wrong. Just think of it as an ongoing Karaoke Night, except it's the kind that shows up right at your desk at work, so there's none of that pesky "going out at night" hassle.
Deborah is our director of inside sales. She holds an MBA and business degree from the University of Tennessee, and she comes to Emma after a decade in the digital marketing world and a semester at Disney World. Deborah assures us she has no plans to make Emma more like Disney World other than installing a giant rotating teacup over by the conference room and encouraging the product team to occasionally dress up in giant mouse costumes and go around freaking people out. That stuff was in the works anyway. But back to Deborah: she's just your typical competitive ballroom dancing half-marathon runner who enjoys traveling the world and watching The Twilight Zone. Rumor has it she can tie her shoelaces in some magical way that doesn't involve a knot. And while she claims her grandfather taught her, most everyone just assumes it was the fairy godmother from Cinderella, given that lady's undeniable track record with magical shoe stuff.
David is a senior member of our sales team and has pretty much locked up the title of Biggest Mets Fan in the Office. (Incidentally, the title of Biggest Maroon 5 Fan remains completely wide open.) A Brooklyn native and NYU grad, David may or may not wear mostly blue-and-orange clothing in honor of the aforementioned Mets, and he may or may not know the pitching staff’s combined ERA for each of the past seven seasons. David also wields a most impressive CD collection from his years managing a Virgin Megastore and Sam Goody store in Greenwich Village, though not so impressive may be the presence of Poison’s Greatest Hits in said collection. What can we say — every rose has its thorn. We’ve been instructed to insert the phrase “Go Mets!” here to avoid having a certain band’s greatest hits disc thrown at us any moment now.